Monday, April 02, 2007

'COVER UP' ON HIS AND BRADLEY'S £250,000 TRIP TO CANNES

Colin 'Cover Up' Hilton has returned from his £250,000 trip to the south of France - determined to cover up what really went on.
The cash-strapped city council's current chief executive (extreme left in picture) has regaled council staff with an utterly banal account of his adventures in Cannes in his internal report.
However, Cover Up omits any details of the three informal drinks receptions and buffet lunches on the Liverpool Yacht which he and current Council Leader Warren Bradley attended, or one of the highlights of MIPIM 2007, the four course dinner with free wine at "the excellent La Potinier du Palais" five star restaurant.
This was, according to the programme notes, a fairly informal dinner, (that means it was drunken, ed)) hosted by Council Leader Warren 'I'm only a fireman' Bradley and 'Cover Up' and attended by the entire city council and Culture Company delegation, which included, bizarrely, the bullshitter, Kris Donaldson (not in picture, amazingly, ed)
Fortunately, all evidence of Cover Up and Bradley's presence at many of these 'social events' has been carefully excised from the Liverpool at MIPIM photographic record (rather in the manner of Stalin's Russia, ed).
Liverpool Confidential has even more pictures here
Cover Up's account of Cannes also omitted to mention (below) the LIVERPOOL@MORRISON’S PARTY in an Irish pub - "the best event in town", which, according to the publicity, offered "the ideal opportunity to unwind with guests at the end of a busy MIPIM week."
Cover Up and Bradley both managed to avoid getting their picture taken here with a pint of Guinness in hand and totally shamrocked.
Fortunately, the city council had, once again, "managed to secure private access to the street". As well as "live music from the Mersey Beatles, there were bar facilities both inside and out."
Cover Up also drew a veil over events at closing time on the last night at Cannes, which by all accounts featured several notable city figures, wandering around slightly the worse for wear, with one throwing up on la Croisette. (That's the prom to you and me and anyway, they were only unwinding after a busy MIPIM week, no doubt, ed).
The cost to our cash-strapped council of this continental week-long jaunt is estimated by councillors (they were not invited, ed) as at least £250,000 - including hire of the yacht for a week, hire of a five star restaurant, return flights for Cover Up, Bradley and a football team's worth of assorted city council hangers on, taxis to and from the yacht etc, a week's accomodation in a huge five star hotel , lunches, breakfasts, dinners, hire of the The Mersey Beatles, etc, etc.
But none of this - (apart from Cover Up's apparent obsession with 'the bar', see later, ed) - got a mention in his excruciating internal column for city council staff.
If you can bear the boredom and the turgid prose, here it is:

"Last week I spent three days with the Liverpool delegation at MIPIM - an event which keeps growing both in importance and size. The general feedback at the end of the week was that it had been the best ever for our city.
The new stand produced better footfall and increased contacts as well as giving us the opportunity to promote the city outside on the main concourse (he's in a world of his own, ed).
Apart from the set presentations, which continued to develop the theme of Liverpool as an international city ripe for investment, my time was divided between meeting key business contacts and speaking to other cities representatives (notice he doesn't say who he had a three minute chat with, ed).
There is a strong interest in the plans for North Liverpool both from existing partners and other companies looking to invest for the first time.
I had a long discussion (more than five mins, ed) with developers about getting the right quality in place and the balance necessary to protect the heritage environment.
In particular, people were excited by the 'Liverpool Waters' presentation of Peel Holdings and the potential regeneration effect of both Project Jennifer and the investment in Liverpool FC by George Gillett and Tom Hicks (nothing whatsoever to do with the city council, however, ed)
Three new promising contacts reflected the growing reputation of Liverpool as a centre for biomedical research, the health sector and wealth management (the £250,000-a-year Cover Up gave them some good advice on managing their wealth, ed)
On the other city stands I was particularly impressed by Toronto who are continuing to develop their waterfront and have a connection with Liverpool through George Gillett - in terms of developing sports stadia and the surrounding infrastructure (absolutely fascinating, ed)
Also there in significant numbers for the first time were the emerging cities of the Russian Federation fuelled by the wealth of natural mineral resources and seeking considerable building development opportunities (perhaps Cover Up is anticipating a move to Siberia in future?, ed)
My favourite piece of architecture on display (is this guy for real? ed) was the Empire Tower in Abu Dhabi, part of a region where status is being symbolised in an ever-increasing rivalry to build spectacular buildings. In terms of quality and accessibility, one of the most interesting developments was the new leisure and tourist zone on Sentosa Island Singapore (this will go down well in Anfield, ed)
I came away with a clear impression that Liverpool has a distinct and positive offer to make on a global stage but that there is still a need to raise the bar (see, he has got booze on the brain! ed) on delivering those things which create prosperity and economic growth to a level which makes us competitive with the top global locations (utter bollocks, ed)
(But not a word about the council's £29million cuts, or the cover-ups, or the cock-ups. And not a word about what specific and tangible benefits this jaunt has ever brought to Liverpool, ed)

9 comments:

Tori Blare said...

Go to Liverpool confidential for more info on Cannes.

You know quite well that someone else writes this propaganda "Colin's Page".?

Anonymous said...

Hey Tony, while you were away (presumably not in Cannes) you missed the fireman bradley making an absolute horlicks of the evertion/liverpool groundshare idea. he was photographed in the echo outside the town hall with an everton scarf around his neck. this put me in mind of the famous storey picture of storey trying to head a ball at kings dock (better idea) when everton were lined up to go there. anyway, bradley was semi incoherent in interviews he gave to the echo and was justifiably trashed by everyone. he came across as a jibbering idiot. you would have loved it. he seems to have performed the incredible knack of alienating the red half of the city by coming out so publicly as a blue AND the blue half by coming out in favour of some ludicrous last-ditch ground share idea, where everton were meant to go cap in hand to the red shite. as if. anyway his credibility has taken yet another knock with anyone, as you would say, with half a brain. (but obviously not Lib Dem councillors)

Anonymous said...

A Lib Dem with half a brain like a jibbering idiot... never... i dont believe it

Anonymous said...

Its good to know that our hardworking City leaders who do such a good job for us are able to have a bit of a knees up and time out marvellous

Anonymous said...

i think its very sad that our council leader has to get all camera shy once a year when he goes on the piss in cannes. why can't he be camera shy all the year round? it would have done him some good with everton and liverpool fans recently....

Anonymous said...

Bloody hell, I thought you were finally going to leave us alone Tony. Why can't I just buy you a few drinks and we can let bygones be bygones?

Anonymous said...

If I get you a bottle of Bud can we call it quits?

Tori Blare said...

Get the jibbering idiots out of office! Get out in May and use your vote!

Anonymous said...

No mention of Edge Lane project in Colin's mipim missive? Perhaps it's been canned.