Friday, May 04, 2007


Dear blogosphere,

We are taking the Bank Holiday off to celebrate the well deserved demise of Inspector Clueless in the local elections and the extremely heartening results in Liverpool, dramatically bucking the national trend.

Congratulations to all concerned. Especially to those who played such a fantastic role in helping get rid of one of the most pompous, self-opinionated, puffed up (literally, ed) arrogant, stupid and naive Lib Dem tossers, it has ever been our misfortune to come across.

Revenge is sweet.

We will be back on Tuesday with some extremely interesting material about some remaining very senior Lib Dem councillors.

We are also interested in hearing more detail about the astonishing dirty tricks which went on in the local election campaign, which are already attracting the attention of the police and the Standards Board for England.

(Oh, we do love to tease, ed)

Now, pass me the champagne....


Anonymous said...

I love this, from the Guardian a year or two back...

"We were invited upstairs and then the candidate, Richard Marbrow, came in. He looked like Charles Kennedy, without the ginger hair. Very smiley, happy. "We don't do canvassing, it irritates people. Phoning people irritates them too. We just put our leaflets through letter-boxes.""

Looks like this particular irritant has been well and truly scratched.


Anonymous said...

The fearless Inspector got off early on Thursday night, so sure was he of defeat.

Unfortunately, in so doing, he left Cllr Doran and Phil Moffatt entirely on their own to fight the battles that should have been his.

Selfish and self-centred? Surely not

To quote a certain leader ten years ago this week " a new day has dawned, has it not"?

Goodbye and good riddance - the ode on the walkin' the dog blog is particularly wonderful, you should link to it.

Anonymous said...

Phillip Marbrowe, Private Eysore.

I sat alone with my thoughts as the night handed over to a darker day and grey clouds obscured the new dawn.

No sign of that early summer sun that had been my companion as I travelled door to door earlier in the week. I had been searching to see who was likely to wanna cross me. I shoulda known. The word on the street was "scram" But I thought, even if a home run was as likely as Henry Ford joining the communist league, I could still make first base.

I guess somebody had to take the rap,they always do, just this time the fall guy was me. Believe me, Humpty Dumpty had it easy.

I sat alone. My head heavy in my hands. Breakfast had been left out for me but the dry tightness in my throat as the events of the last night sank in, made it impossible to eat. Just a few eggs, nine pancakes, a pack of bacon, a Vienna loaf a few burgers,some sausages, grilled ham, cereal, toast, three wagon wheels and a fortune cookie was all I could manage.

As I read the fortune cookie, for a few moments my mood and my appetite flickered towards the positive ."Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your lunch" it read. Sure...but now lunch is cold-cuts.

My mood dipped even lower. Kenny Fields had a new favourite and I'd been given a one-way ticket to skid-row. If it hadn't been for those double crossers I coulda still been number one. But the DA said they couldn't take account of 'em. Those lousy ballots.

Bugs Doran, would now have to look after himself. Maybe it was Bugs "took care" of me, to save his own neck. After all, he had been a rat once before, but that was when rats were needed and they had once helped save all our necks. But these were new times, had I been set up or was I deluding myself? Maybe nine years as the big cheese in town had created a lactic intolerance amongst John and Jane Dough. Maybe what was once the alluring fragrance of fine Camembert had turned to the lingering stench of an over-ripe Limburgher.

Then I realised, maybe it wasn't me they had rejected, maybe it was the company I had been keeping. Had I spent too much time in the Italian quarter?

That was it, of course! The Femme Fatale I should been out there kissin' babies but my lips had been too darn busy with the other great love of my life, the mistress who had me at her beckoned call. Yeah, it was clear, They'd stopped seeing me and thought I was hiding behind a tasty little Italian broad. Well she was tasty alright but it was no dame I was hooked on. They must have heard the name Margarhita and put two and two together making five. The irony is, they was right. Five Margarhitas was my regular order at the local pizza hut. But last night the Pizza dough turned sour. Even the four seasons became monsoons. Guess they thought I was just gettin too big for the neighbourhood. Maybe I was being blamed for the road widening scheme and they wanted to put the squeeze on me.

So what's my next move I thought. I had given those suckers nine years of my life. I stepped outside into the cold air and took one last look around my ex territory. With a small tear building in the well of my eye, I gazed up at the monuments to my time. Maybe my epitaphs. The Job Bank...I may need that...and the Hey, I thought, maybe it aint such a bad day...this could be the start of something big mac,yeah sure...Have a nice day,

You want fries with that? Too late sucker I ate 'em.

Tori Blare said...

I'm still knackered waiting for this result on Thursday it didn't come in till about 1.30 ish maybe later.
It was worth staying up though!
I witnessed a good fight at Croxteth ward and this Marbrow oust just made me so happy I wet me keks!
Not literally.
It really is the best news of the year.
Who is going to investigate you now?
The only part of the evening that was not joyous was the presence of the BMP. Even the counters were growling at them as they were counting the votes!
Pity the police didn't arrest them.
It was really funny when Hilton was reading the results, no-one was taking any notice of him and most spoke over him, so much I could hardly hear what he said!

I wait with anticipation at your news and may add more myself.
Roll on the next elections when Labour can take control and the council will be safe from McElhinney and Hasitall.
The campaigne starts on Tuesday, we all deserve a rest after the last few months.

Anonymous said...

A certain councillor (very closely associated with the last two leaders) not only losing their role on the council but also their job and perhaps their liberty. That will be a massive one that could unseat the whole party.

Certain "leaders" standing accused of bully boy tactics, acting like a 7 year old trying to intimidate candidates then claiming it was he who needed "police protection" (a lie) - some tough fireman that is then!

Certain results, despite countless recounts, being taken to the electoral court due to admitted discrepancies and illegal practices.

Certain "agents" being so pissed off with their own campaign going so badly that they leave their candidates in the lurch.

Oh yes, Election 2007 was a strange one for the Lib Dems. It may also prove to be a criminal one that could bring down their entire party on the city.

Certainly, if jail beckons for one of them (who is meant to uphold their standards), others may fly the nest too. Keep an eye on the news!!

Anonymous said...

I managed to go to the election count last Thursday when the bald eagle - un-affectionately known as Ken Unworthy - looked totally confused when Jim Noakes pushed Bradley at the Croxteth recount because he 'wasn't a candidate or agent'. I was waiting for Bradley to sing 'ner ner na ner ner - just because you're loosing'. What a hoot.

Unworthy seemed upset that there would be no carrion for him until at least 10am but patiently stood, with his nose in the air, at Hiltons side to wait for his instructions. Maybe the brown stuff on his nose was starting to pong a bit.

Hilton mumbled the results -what a comfort to know he was being paid vast sums of money to do it. Hilton was put in the shade by the honest, efficient, hard working elections officer David Kidger. 'Bring back Charlie Lasham' is what everyone was saying. Kidger does all the work and Hilton picks up the cash.

What fun and games at the count - except for the BNP marching about intimidating people. Maybe Jason and the CoC could make election counts a public event for 2008.

Anonymous said...

Gilton's got about as much presence as a wet fish

Anonymous said...

Ode to R.Marbrow

So farewell Richard your time has come and you are gone,

Your Jolly demeanour and your Soap Star good looks (Barry from Eastenders),

Did not help you convince Kenny and his friends

To keep you in the lifestyle you have grown accustomed to;

No more laptops, no more large allowances,free lunches or bottled water,

You managed to escape the Franeys and their wrath

But not the displeasure of the local electo-rat

You are no longer able to watch and scratch Frank’s back

So who will do it now,

Not Wendy

Not Louise,

At least not without

A barge pole of approximately 3 metres in length.

The masked floating

Anonymous said...

I worked under The Rottie in Knowsley. He is an out and out bully,who in his time at knowsley flattened more council buildings than the Luftwaffe

Anonymous said...

Some skin head fella was following Bradley around all night, is he Bradley's minder?
He was the one causing the pushing!

Bradley looked as though his head was going to explode, it went so red!

With Dickie getting off before his result was even announced,gave cause for much speculation amongst the comments, However I can confirm that Mr Fat Bloke has not sang his last song yet and has been hired by Liverpool Direct Limited to answer DEFRA calls.
He starts on Tuesday, but still doesn't have a seat, even there, there are none big enough!

Anonymous said...

we don't do Marbrow, HE IRRITATES PEOPLE

Anonymous said...

Cllr Marbrowe delivered a leaflet to my home the night before the local election stating the Labour candidate for Kensington lived in Mossley Hill!

Knowing this overeating lard ball had recently moved to Allerton I took his advise in hand and voted for the Labour candidate along with quite a few of my Kensington Nieghbours because he is a misleading hypocrite.

Mr Marbrowe do not take the P*** out of the L7 electrotate again please and DO NOT COME BACK HERE try your chances in Allerton or even better your home town in the West Midlands.

Kenny Ken

Anonymous said...

Has anyone seen Marbrow and Barry from Eastenders in the same room at the same time?
They are one and the same person.

Mind you Barry seems a nice bloke, Marbrow just ate all the pies and treated the people of Liverpool with utter contempt.
Allerton does not have enough fast food joints for him to stand there, anyway people should not encourage him it's not nice, he will just be ridiculed again.
I feel sorry for him, a fat ugly pompous sweaty, arrogant, snivelling, greasy, wobbly irritating thing, what has he got going for him?
It's not over till the fat man sings.
That would be a tune and a half.
Any budding lyrical people out there please consider writing a song or ditty for Richard, it is so sad to see such talent going to waste.
He could sing it at the Winter festival or even the Summer Sefton Pops.
Alan Churchman could ask the coleman if there are any spots available?
Status Quo will NOT play with him though as they can't all fit on the stage at the same time.